As long as I can remember, August has been one of my favorite months. Despite the dog days of summer heat, it’s a time of anticipation and excitement. My mom and I developed a professional partnership during our annual Back-to-School Shopping trips which probably began as early as preschool. When I was going into Kindergarten, we purchased my very first First Day of School Outfit: a maroon bodysuit top and a coordinating floral, wait for it… skort. (That’s right, I’ve always lived with a certain amount of swagger.) As the years progressed, so did the shopping experience. Gone were the days of skorts as Mom and I moved on to Limited Too and Delia*s, where we purchased only the coolest fluorescent fleece zips ups and choker necklaces that were made of cheap plastic. Despite the evolving trends, the feeling remained the same. Choosing a new backpack, finding out who my teacher would be, calling my friends’ houses to find out if they would be in my same class, going on the hunt for the perfect pencil case. As I got older, it became a decision of which clubs and activities I would participate in, choosing my electives, and always stocking up on new pens. Nothing is better than a new package of pens. Nothing is better than back to school shopping. This year, however, there seem to be more than just a few things overshadowing the Annual August Excitement.
Since the age of five, I have never not had an August that is focused on Back to School. As an adult, it certainly looks different. These days, I’m intent on developing student placement and teacher schedules. As a mom, I’m making sure Clara is placed in the right environment. And this year, I’m obviously focused on the fact that everything we have ever known when it comes to school is out the window. There are far more unknowns than there are knowns. There are far more tears than there are smiles. There are far more feelings of fear and dread than there are excitement and anticipation. There’s not a single parent out there who knows how to make a confident decision, so they look to the educators, the experts if you will, for answers. The thing is though, not even the experts have experience this time around. We have knowledge that we can fall back on, we certainly have the insight to seek input from medical professionals, but when all is said and done, just like parents, educators are left to make the best possible decisions with the information we have now. And chances of that information changing between now and the start of school is high.
There is one thing I can say with confidence: I’m remarkably proud of the work my colleagues and I have done in these past months. Without warning, your children’s teachers redesigned what education looks like in the matter of a weekend. These educators researched, collaborated, read, and met long before and long after each class zoom session. Teachers adapted as they went, school leaders made notes of all the places we could improve, and parents stumbled through the stresses of working and teaching from home. And then summer came. Though there were of course pitfalls, I would say remote learning was remarkably successful in my experience. And as successful as it was with twenty hours of notice, imagine what we have done within three months! Do not get me wrong, it will not be perfect. Even if we were given two or three years to fully develop the concept of remote learning or a hybrid model of schooling, it still wouldn’t be perfect. Teaching isn’t perfect. Even the most beautifully designed and aligned lesson plan can go ary when a child throws out a single curveball question. A global pandemic is the greatest curveball the world of education has ever seen.
There are many parents out there who are looking for the right answer: do I send my children to school or do I keep them home? No one can answer that question because there is no right answer. Each family out there is different. We all have different circumstances, different options, and a very different list of pros and cons. In our family, we have made the decision to send Clara to school in-person as long as that is an option for us. When her preschool closed in March, we very quickly realized how challenging the remote platform was for her. She was not simply disengaged, but rather, she became defiant. Her “calls” resulted in tantruming, hiding under her bed, and completely shutting down. We stopped joining her preschool zooms, we cancelled her virtual ballet membership, and we pulled her out of the weekly social skills call. (And yes, don’t worry, the irony of a social skills class without being social is not lost on us. We were simply trying our best to meet her needs.) For us, we have decided that we’re willing to take a physical health risk to ensure her mental, social and emotional health. We know that our Clara has regressed these past few months and we know that a remote program simply will not be successful for her. The bottom line is that we have made this decision because we believe it is what is best for our daughter and our family. And, for what is it worth, we did not take this decision lightly.
And now, as August has arrived, we begin to prepare for back to school. I’m stocking up on brightly colored masks and glittery hand sanitizer, anything to make following the guidelines more exciting for a toddler. I’m also stocking up on neutral-colored masks and run-of-the-mill hand sanitizer for myself as well; I suppose I don’t need to be thrilled by social distancing as much as Clara does. I will, however, do my best to match my mask to my outfit… gotta keep up that swagger! We talk a lot about the CoronaVirus in our house, why we have to wear masks, and why things in her life are so different these days. We will start talking about school too, and that’s the part that scares me the most. I want so badly for this to be a positive experience for her, but I don’t fully know how to prepare her. That is where I will have to rely on her teachers. We have made our decision, and now she will be in their hands. I will trust that they will teach her, help her foster peer relationships, and keep her safe to the best of their abilities. After all, that is what the parents of my students will be doing, and the one thing I can promise them is that I will not let them down.
